Assorted stuff

Jun. 19th, 2025 05:18 pm
oursin: The stylised map of the London Underground, overwritten with Tired of London? Tired of Life! (Tired of London? Tired of Life!)
[personal profile] oursin

Dept, vain adornment, sort of. Went to get my hair trimmed, as after several months since it was cropped it was getting a bit messy. I went back to the same place (not the one I used to go to in Bloomsbury, for Reasons including my favourite stylist doesn't seem to be there any longer) where the lady half of the operation does a very nice cut and it is not at all expensive.

I do wonder a bit though - it was entirely deserted except for me, and they wanted paying in cash. It may just be it was a quiet day and the cash card reader was broken. But one wonders if it's A FRONT for something, though pretty much every third business around there that's not an estate agent or a grocer's or fast food place of some ethnicity or other, this being a particularly multi-ethnic corner of Our Fair City, is a hairdresser's/barber's/beauty parlour.

***

Dept, this was RUDE: I don't care if he was young - ? primary school age - you do not do this on a London bus, infamy, infamy, etc. I was returning from the above appointment and the downstairs on the bus being rather chokka, went upstairs and scored the prime position, front seat, left-hand. And a stop or so later, little boy gets on and cheekily comes and sits next. Opposite - right hand - seat was empty and the whole top deck was by no means crowded.

Also he gave signs of being an incipient manspreader.

***

Dept of, further on sitting in the wrong place (I meant to add this to the post the other day on Being Inappropriate on Social Media): Tourists damage crystal-covered chair in Italian museum by sitting on it:

An Italian museum has contacted the police after two clumsy tourists almost wrecked a work of art while posing for photos.
Video footage released by Palazzo Maffei in Verona showed the hapless pair photographing each other pretending to sit on a crystal-covered chair made by the artist Nicola Bolla – described by the museum as an “extremely fragile” work.
The woman squats and does not seem to touch the work – called Van Gogh’s Chair and covered in Swarovski crystals – but the man is not so careful, sitting and then stumbling backwards as the seat buckles under his weight.
The pair can then be seen fleeing the room in footage that went viral over the weekend.

oursin: Photograph of small impressionistic metal figurine seated reading a book (Reader)
[personal profile] oursin

What I read

Finished Wide is the Gate, and while things are getting grimmer and grimmer as regards The World Situation, I am still very much there for Our Protag Lanny being a mild-mannered art dealer with a secret identity as anti-fascist activist, who gets on with everybody and is quite the antithesis of the Two-Fisted Hollywood Hero. (I was thinking who would I cast in the role and while there's a touch of the Jimmy Stewarts, the social aplomb and little moustache - William Powell?)

Lates Literary Review.

Mary Gordon, The Chase of the Wild Goose: The Story of Lady Eleanor Butler and Miss Sarah Ponsonby, Known as the Ladies of Llangollen (1936), which is sort-of a classic version of their story recently republished. But o dear, it does one of my pet hates, which is blurring 'imaginative recreation' with 'biographical research' and skipping between the two modes, and then in the final chapter she encounters the ghosts of of the Ladies, I can't even, really. Plus, Gordon, who was b. 1861, obtained medical education, fought for suffrage, etc, nevertheless disses on Victorian women as 'various kinds of imbecile', unlike those robust and politically-engaged ladies of the Georgian era. WOT. TUT. Also honking class issues about how the Ladies were Ladies and always behaved accordingly.

Began Robert Rodi, What They Did to Princess Paragon (1994), which was just not doing it for me, I can be doing with viewpoint characters being Not Nice, but I was beginning to find both of them (the comic-book writer and the fanboy) tedious.

Also not doing it for me, Barbara Vine, The Child's Child (2012): sorry, the inset novel did not read to me like a real novel of the period at which it was supposed to have been writ as opposed to A Historical Novel of Those Oppressive Times of the early C20th. Also, in frame narrative, I know PhD student who is writing thesis on unwed mothers in literature is doing EngLit but I do think someone might have mentioned (given period at which she is supposed to be doing this) the historiography on The Foundling Hospital.

I then turned to Shirley Jackson, We Have Always Lived in the Castle (1962), which it is a very long time since I read.

Then I was reduced to Agatha Christie, By the Pricking of My Thumbs (1968), and Murder in the Mews (1937).

On the go

I happened to spot my copy of Margery Sharp, Cluny Brown (1944), which I know I was looking for a while ago, and am reading that though it looks as though I re-read it more recently than I thought.

Have also begun on Books For Review.

Up Next

Really dunno.

oursin: Photograph of James Miranda Barry, c. 1850 (James Miranda Barry)
[personal profile] oursin

Honestly, people. How is this even A Thing?

NHS staff unsettled by patients filming care and posting videos on social media.

When partner first mentioned this to me I was 'Do they even let them into operating theatre and what about scrubbing up etc?', because I assumed it wasn't actually the patient doing this, and in fact reading further it does seem to be accompanying persons.

Radiographers, who take X-rays and scans, fear the trend could compromise the privacy of other patients being treated nearby and lead to staff having their work discussed online.
The Society of Radiographers (SoR) has gone public with its unease after a spate of incidents in which patients, or someone with them in the hospital, began filming their care.
On one occasion a radiology department assistant from the south coast was inserting a cannula into a patient who had cancer when their 19-year-old daughter began filming.
“She wanted to record the cannulation because she thought it would be entertaining on social media.* But she didn’t ask permission,” the staff member said.
“I spent the weekend afterwards worrying: did I do my job properly? I know I did, but no one’s perfect all the time and this was recorded. I don’t think I slept for the whole weekend.”
They were also concerned that a patient in the next bay was giving consent for a colonoscopy – an invasive diagnostic test – at the same time as the daughter was filming her mother close by. “That could all have been recorded on the film, including names and dates of birth,” they said.
Ashley d’Aquino, a therapeutic radiographer in London, said a colleague had agreed to take photographs for a patient, “but when the patient handed over her phone the member of staff saw that the patient had also been covertly recording her, to publish on her cancer blog.

*Emphasis mine.

First we go back to miasmatic theory, then we go back to operations as spectator sport?

How very different, I would argue, are Barbara Hepworth's 'Hospital Drawings':

Capener began purchasing some of Hepworth’s art, which in turn helped with the costs of her daughter’s surgery. He later asked the artist if she might be interested in observing some of the procedures taking place in the operating theatre. Hepworth, initially horrified by this thought, decided to go. The materials that she needed to make her sculptures were scarce during postwar Britain, meaning she also had more time on her hands to explore other projects.
Hepworth soon became fascinated with the surgical process. She was particularly moved by the methodical rhythm of the surgeon’s hands and the concentration in their eyes. The eyes and hands are rendered with a delicacy and softness, with attentively modulated grey-white tones. They emerge from the cruder, more abstract marks in blue, green and other similar hues. Her drawing techniques somehow brings the scene to life; the many flowing lines are suggestive of the creases forming in the doctors’ blue gowns, created by their constant movement around the horizontal, inert patient. After many visits, Hepworth had created a body of work which revealed her wonderful abilities as a draughtsperson, as well as a sculptor.

mousme: A turquoise twenty-sided die that has landed on "1." The caption reads: "Shit." (Natural One)
[personal profile] mousme
I am taking solace in a quote from Charles Darwin's diary:  'But I am very poorly today & very stupid & I hate everybody & everything. One lives only to make blunders.'

So even brilliant naturalists were prone to having horrible depression days. I'm not actually depressed, I don't think, or at least not as badly as I remember it being back when I was actually depressed (a quarter of a century ago now, wow!). Or maybe I am situationally depressed as opposed to chemically imbalanced depressed, and maybe that feels different? I don't know.

Anyway, I am being a major bummer to be around for everyone, including myself. If I could get away with it, I'd hide in my bedroom in my bed for the next six months or so until the universe decides to turn things around. Unfortunately, I still have to interact with the world. 

On that note, I have to get back to work. Catch you on the flip side, friends!

I wish I had something nice to say

Jun. 15th, 2025 11:00 pm
mousme: A text icon that reads: "When the sun has set, no candle can replace it." (Sun has set)
[personal profile] mousme
My weekend didn't get any better. I didn't even want to post yesterday so I kind of skipped it and am back-dating this entry. Normally that only happens when I get super busy or when a day gets ahead of me, but yesterday I just couldn't bring myself to sit at a keyboard and write about everything that's going wrong.

It would be nice to have good news to share again, but these days it's all mostly just me complaining about everything that's going wrong, which isn't nice for anyone, even me. So I guess I'll be sticking to short updates until I get less depressing. ;)

Catch you on the flip side, friends!

A certain chuffedness

Jun. 16th, 2025 07:55 pm
oursin: hedgehog wearing a yellow flower (Hedgehog with flower)
[personal profile] oursin

I cannot help myself feeling a certain gratification when a reviews editor calls the reviews I have just submitted 'beautifully written' and is eager to solicit further (though as I have several others in hand, may not take this up very urgently....) (Preen, preen.)

Have also been solicited quite out of the blue to take part in a podcast. WOT.

It is also very pleasing that the return of Lady Bexbury and her extensive circle is appreciated.

***

Not so very long ago I posted about this lady who worked for SOE way back when: and now Blaise Metreweli named as first woman to lead UK intelligence service MI6.

I thought The secret lives of MI6’s top female spies this was connected - it's actually 2022 but maybe being reposted for the new association. There are several paragraphs of aged former secret agent lady waxing snarky about the sexism aforetimes that precluded advancement up the ranks.

Beneath her tales of life in the service there is real anger about the way women were treated. Both she and her great friend, Daphne Park — a fellow senior SIS officer who died in 2010 at the age of 88 — led distinguished careers but failed to reach the highest ranks. This, they suspected, was due to their gender.
Ramsay speaks in a soft Scots burr which rises audibly when I ask about SIS’s record on female officers. She feels particularly aggrieved that Park, a life-long intelligence officer who held SIS postings in Moscow, Lusaka, Hanoi and Ulan Bator, did not progress to the most senior levels. (MI6 would neither confirm nor deny it had employed Park.) “There’s no doubt in my mind that Daphne should have been at least one rung up as the deputy chief position. I can say that without any equivocation,” Ramsay says, tapping a lacquered pink fingernail on the table. Park, described unkindly in one obituary as looking “more like Miss Marple than Mata Hari”, resigned early from the service in 1979, having told a friend that she would never be promoted to SIS chief because of her gender.
By the early 1990s, Ramsay was rumoured to be in the running for the post of C, although shortlists are never publicly acknowledged. Privately, she thought the promotion of a woman to that role would still be “quite impossible”.... She observes that while many talented women such as Noor Inayat Khan excelled in the Special Operations Executive, a wartime secret service and sabotage unit set up in 1940, there was a long period afterwards when women ceased to be employed as intelligence officers at all. Ramsay recounts an episode in the 1970s when she came across a woman she thought would make a “perfect” agent-runner. She telephoned the head of recruitment to discuss the prospect, who told her they weren’t looking for women. “He said, ‘It would take an extraordinary gel’ — and it was the ‘gel’ that got to me — ‘to be an intelligence officer’. And I said, ‘Well, it would take an extraordinary boy too, but it hasn’t stopped you recruiting males!’”

(no subject)

Jun. 16th, 2025 10:04 am
oursin: Brush the Wandering Hedgehog by the fire (Default)
[personal profile] oursin
Happy birthday, [personal profile] quoththeravyn and [personal profile] rahael!

Culinary

Jun. 15th, 2025 07:16 pm
oursin: Frontispiece from C17th household manual (Accomplisht Lady)
[personal profile] oursin

Last week's bread held out very well.

There was even enough left over to make frittata with chopped red bell pepper for Friday night supper.

Saturday breakfast rolls: brown toasted pinenut, with strong brown flour.

Today's lunch: partridge breasts lightly seasoned with salt and pepper, panfried in butter with a little olive oil, deglazed with a splash or so of white wine, served with kasha, baby sugar snap peas roasted in walnut oil and splashed with elderflower vinegar, and asparagus steamed and tossed in melted butter + lime juice.

I got nothing

Jun. 14th, 2025 08:45 pm
mousme: A text icon in pale blue that reads Winter is Coming (Winter is Coming)
[personal profile] mousme
I don't have a long post in me today. The home visit with American Brittany Rescue went really well, and if Odin gets along well with the other dogs I will have the green light to bring him home, which is great.

That was the only good part of the day, because I received a notice in the mail that H&R Block made a mistake (?) with my taxes, to the tune of nearly $13,000 (I owe about $3.5K to H&R Block because they advanced me my supposed tax refund, and $9.5k to CRA). I don't know where I am supposed to find any of this money. I have never in my life owed this much money on taxes, and I am honestly at a loss as to how this happened. I need to dig out my tax paperwork and have someone at H&R Block walk me through step by step how this happened, and why the fuck their mistake is now suddenly my problem.

I honestly feels like, because I got a house and this is a nice thing, the universe has felt the need to balance this out by doing nothing but shit on me for the past two months or so. Like, can I get a fucking break, please? My parents were hospitalized, I got Covid, I had to work extra hours, there were problems with the mortgage and the closing and the insurance for the new place, KK got sick the day of the move and we had to postpone (which means I had to spend money on the cancellation, another month's rent and utilities mostly at my own expense because KK has no spare money), both cats needed $3k worth of dental surgery, I need to buy a CPAP next week (more money) my car needs repairs that are getting done this weekend (more money), and now this (the epitome of more fucking money).

Honestly, it's enough to make me want to throw myself off the closest high bridge. At least my life insurance might pay off some of the debt.

Where would I even begin?

Jun. 14th, 2025 05:28 pm
oursin: Books stacked on shelves, piled up on floor, rocking chair in foreground (books)
[personal profile] oursin

(And didn't we have something similar, like, maybe 20 years ago on LiveJournal?)

Thing going round on bluesky recently-

'Ten authors you've read five books by'.

*Looks around just one room and its bookshelves*

Me: Maybe I could break this down into groups, I dunno, perhaps?

Thrillers? Sff? Litfic? (might break this down further into Obscure Victorian/Edwardian Novelists, Middlebrow Women Writers of the 20s/30s, the 60s Generation???) Bloke writers for whom I have a weakness? Beloved childhood faves?

And then I think, nah, this is too much effort.

I was a bit took aback by suggestions that people might be curating their 10 to look Cool or SRS or at least, not given to ingesting The Wrong Sort of Book, perish the thort.

There is no god of wakefulness

Jun. 13th, 2025 02:26 pm
mousme: A view of a woman's legs from behind, wearing knee-high rainbow socks. The rest of the picture is black and white. (Default)
[personal profile] mousme

I was going to make a joke about making a sacrifice (or perhaps an offering) to the god(s) of wakefulness, but it turns out that there are only gods of sleep and dreaming and they just happen to also have wakefulness as part of their domain or sphere of influence.  Either way, I made choices yesterday that resulted in my getting to sleep a lot later than my good intentions. I don't think these fall into the category of poor life choices, though.

I had some errands that I had to run, specifically to pick up more quail feed (I had thought I had enough to last until the weekend, but my calculation was off by a couple of days) and more toothpaste for the dogs. Yes, I do brush the dogs' teeth every day. Honestly, if I could manage it, I'd brush the cats' teeth too, and that would have spared me the nearly $3,000 vet bill from a couple of weeks ago, but the cats do NOT take kindly to having their mouths messed with. The dogs are wriggly about it, but otherwise they let me brush their teeth without too much fuss. Anyway, we always have a backup tube of toothpaste, but of course the backup tube is packed in a box somewhere, so I had to buy another one. I suppose we could have let the dogs go for a week either without brushing at all or just brushing without toothpaste (I am quite sure KK doesn't brush their teeth when I'm not home in the evenings because I'm at work), but it wasn't that much of a hardship to detour for 15 minutes to go pick some up at one of the local pet stores.

I got home at 6:30pm and allowed KK to persuade me to watch TV with her, although I probably should have taken that time to do something useful. I put the dogs to bed just after 8pm, then went to the basement to put the quail to bed and put away the quail feed into 5-gallon buckets. Fun facts I have discovered: 1) 1 bag of quail feed fits almost perfectly into 3 5-gallon buckets; 2) 6 quail will go through one bag of feed in about 9 weeks (I forget how much the bag weighs, but I think it's 25kg), which means each bird goes through about 600 grams of feed a day, which is 3 times their average body weight; 3) quail feed is dusty AF.

Since I was now coated in quail feed dust, taking a shower seemed like a non-negotiable, so that's what I did.

As an aside, hot showers are pretty glorious things, and honestly having continuous access to fresh running water on demand at temperatures I can regulate according to my whims is going to be one of the things I miss the most if society collapses (even partially) and the grid no longer supports us. There's a lot of stuff we take for granted in our modern society that is kind of hanging by a thread these days, not least of which is clean, potable water and pretty excellent waste management. I'm moving to a place which doesn't have access to a municipal sewage system, but it still has a septic holding tank (not a full septic system with a septic field, interestingly enough) which requires regular emptying by a company that knows what it's doing when it comes to disposing of waste in a safe and sanitary fashion. We eliminated so many illnesses and premature deaths just by figuring out how to dispose of human excrement that I don't think many of us (myself included, if I'm perfectly honest) truly understand how bad things will get once we no longer have access to good sanitation.

Anyway, all that aside, after my shower and general pre-bedtime ablutions, I ended up only getting to bed well after 10:30pm and fell asleep shortly after 11:00pm. Given that I was working the "early" 7am shift today, that made for a shorter night of sleep than I would have liked, but it was all for a good cause. As of next week, since we'll be living much further away, I am going to have to become much more regimented about going to bed at a reasonable hour, because I'm going to need to leave on average 30 minutes earlier than I have been for the last year or so. I'm probably going to have to forgo watching TV with KK in the evenings. That seems like the best way to save a couple of hours in which to get things done. I didn't sit down and watch TV per se before she moved in: often I'll have a TV show or a podcast on kind of in the background as I move around and do things like chores.

I find it weirdly hard to do any kind of chores when KK is in the house, which unfortunately is 99% of the time these days (or else it's during work hours, when I can't do chores anyway because I'm either working or physically at my office). This is entirely a me problem, a weird hangup that I have about getting stuff done where I can be Perceived(TM), especially when she's just sitting and watching TV or playing on her phone or her tablet (or all three at once, as is often the case, which boggles even my ADHD mind). I don't know what it is, exactly, but I just feel weird about cleaning up around her, partly because it kind of feels like I am cleaning up AT her, which is not my intention (although maybe I am subconsciously doing that? It's possible.). Anyway, I am probably overthinking this.

My shift is nearly over, thank goodness, because today has been nothing but a long list of frustrations because of our automated SOPs. When they work, they are great. However, today a supervisor decided to take them offline without warning (our manager gave the instructions but apparently it wasn't meant to happen until next week), and I lost all of the work I had done on a rather complicated file, which was just maddening. And then I went around in circles with said supervisor about it for a while, and finally had to start my file over from scratch using an older version.

Whoops, shit is hitting the fan. I will leave this here for now. Catch you on the flip side, friends!

Various & misc

Jun. 13th, 2025 04:54 pm
oursin: Brush the Wandering Hedgehog by the fire (Default)
[personal profile] oursin

Don't think I've previously either come across this or posted it, but who knows: Out on the Town: Magnus Hirschfeld and Berlin’s Third Sex: 'Years before the Weimar Republic’s well-chronicled freedoms, the 1904 non-fiction study Berlin’s Third Sex depicted an astonishingly diverse subculture of sexual outlaws in the German capital'.

***

Something else suitable for Pride Month: Rachel Carson and the Power of Queer Love (review):

provides an original and stirring account of a non-commodifying queer love between two women and nonhuman nature—a love that was the defining relationship of Carson’s life and yet has been downplayed in heteronormative tellings of her story. So, too, is Maxwell’s work a convincing argument for this queer love’s formative role in the writing of Silent Spring, as well as an empowering message about how embracing queer feelings might function as a catalyst for “political and personal power” in contemporary environmental politics.

***

I think I have some copies of The Pioneer journal associated with this club, but they are somewhere in the maelstrom (I am gearing up to Doing Something About this, having acquired intelligence of a body that will collect books for charity): The Pioneer Club (1892-1939): A ladies' club at the forefront of late Victorian social reform, which suffered a long, slow decline in the early 20th century.

***

Peter McLagan (1823-1900): Scotland’s first Black MP:

[S]ources suggest that McLagan’s mother was probably of Black Caribbean or Black African descent.... McLagan’s father, Peter McLagan (1774-1860)... enslaved over 400 people on his plantations and personal estate in Demerara.

In fact there is strong evidence as mentioned in that article that he was by no means the first Black MP. Issues of class and family connections clearly played a significant role up to the mid-C19th.

***

An ancient writing system confounding myths about Africa:

'How come a country that did not have a colonial past in Zambia had so many artefacts from Zambia in its collection?'"
In the 19th and early 20th Centuries Swedish explorers, ethnographers and botanists would pay to travel on British ships to Cape Town and then make their way inland by rail and foot.
....
The Swedish museum had not done any research on the cloaks - and the National Museums Board of Zambia was not even aware they existed.

***

Artist's work to restore damaged shell grotto (I put this in a short story once.) (My own theory is that it was originally A Folly. Doing things with shells was as I recall quite A Thing in the C18th and Mrs Delany and her mate the Duchess of Portland had a rather less concealed shell grotto?)

oursin: A cloud of words from my LJ (word cloud)
[personal profile] oursin

Okay, am v depressed by all the ongoing hoohah around AI and the people using it rather than their own brains, quite aside from Evil Exploitation aspect -

- but on intellectual pollution, having been moaning inwardly, banging the floor with my ebony cane and beating my head on my antimacassar for a considerable while over the awful errors that appear in prose because the word is correctly spelt but it is THE WRONG BLOODY WORD.

That the person who created that text has not picked up on, sigh, groan.

Insert here a lament for the decline in copy-editing and proof-reading, which might have spotted this sort of thing and corrected it.

I am a little worried that we are now have generations who do not know what words actually mean, because spell-check has not said anything .

This is brought to you by having encountered the term 'itinerary' deployed for something that is not, as far as I can see, a journey, but the programme/timetable for a meeting. Perhaps there is some sense of a progression to be made???

(The mermaids signing, each to each: that is why I cannot hear them.)

Apparently I'm permanently cranky

Jun. 12th, 2025 10:16 am
mousme: A picture of Darth Vader, captioned My Fandom Destroys Planets. (My Fandom Destroys Planets)
[personal profile] mousme
 I lined up all my dominoes yesterday to guarantee an early bedtime. I wrote my posts early, fed the dogs and brushed their teeth early, put the quail to bed early, and had myself in bed winding down before 8pm. My plan was foolproof, or so I thought. I was about to turn out the lights and go to bed when my phone rang. I almost didn't answer because the call was from a Montreal number I didn't recognize. I only ever get calls from either my parents or my friend Lu, and all other calls originating from Montreal are usually wrong numbers trying to reach someone with my number but a different area code.

Then I figured, since it was likely a wrong number, I'd answer and just let them know, and then I could go to bed. NOPE. It was a volunteer from American Brittany Rescue calling to schedule my home visit. Oops. So she and I had a very nice chat and scheduled said home visit for ridiculously early this Saturday, and the very nice lady just. kept. talking. for over an hour. I still got to bed earlier than usual, but it was still 9:30pm, an hour and a half after I was ready to turn in. I am deeply frustrated and not a little cranky about the whole business. I'm going to try for an early night again tonight and hope it works better than last night.

*kicks rocks petulantly*

I am unreasonably annoyed by this specific loss of sleep, probably because A) I am bad at adapting to last-minute changes in my plans, and B) I had lined up everything perfectly in order to get to bed at the time I wanted, and if I just hadn't answered my phone, I could have done just that. Of course, if I'd done that I wouldn't have been able to set up the home visit or talk to the volunteer, so there's that, but I am still unreasonably annoyed.

I am tired of constantly being either in a bad mood, or a hair's breadth away from being in a bad mood after even the tiniest setback. Hopefully my attempts at getting more sleep will pay off in that regard. I don't have the luxury of taking time off work (not more than a day here or there, anyway), and psychiatric medication doesn't seem to be terribly effective for me (although I am being nice and compliant about taking my pills). So I'm going to have to trust that focusing on getting more and hopefully better sleep will have a salutary effect. Maybe not living surrounded by precariously teetering boxes and whatever trash KK has left around for me to pick up will help with my (perceived) stress levels as well. We shall see in a few weeks, I guess.

(no subject)

Jun. 12th, 2025 09:48 am
oursin: Brush the Wandering Hedgehog by the fire (Default)
[personal profile] oursin
Happy birthday, [personal profile] ase!
mousme: A view of a woman's legs from behind, wearing knee-high rainbow socks. The rest of the picture is black and white. (Default)
[personal profile] mousme
 It's been long enough (nearly four weeks) since I worked the AvSec Desk at my job, and I forgot how busy it can get. There's a lull right now, but even though everything else has been pretty quiet, I have basically been going steady since I got in at 08:00. It does have the advantage of making the time go by much faster.

I drove in with KK this morning since we're both in-office today. She had originally wanted to park near her office because the parking is cheaper there, but she got up late and therefore asked that I drive and drop her off and park at my office (conveniently making me pay for parking). It makes more sense to carpool on days when we're both in-office, but she tends to pull these last-minute bait-and-switches on me, and so I think from here on out I'll be making my own way to the office on those days anyway, especially now that we aren't paying for a monthly parking pass anymore. We had one before she got her medical exemption from the three days a week in-office, but now that she only has to go in two days a week or less, and I have only nine to ten in-office days every two months, it's not worth the monthly cost.

I have been a lot less patient with KK lately, and I think it's because I've worn through a lot of my resilience in the past couple of months, between my parents being ill, my getting Covid, the stress of working a bunch of extra hours, all the last-minute legal and financial shenanigans about buying the house, packing up the house, and then having to pull an extra few thousand dollars out of my ass because the move had to be postponed. Each of these things I probably could have handled just fine, even two of them would probably have been stressful but fine, but all of it within a six-week period appears to have taken a toll. Objectively I understand that KK is unable to share the load equally, because she is more physically disabled than I am, and she also doesn't have much money due to having to pay down some considerable amounts of debt (she actually makes about $16k a year more than I do, but I am in much better financial shape than she is). On my good days, I totally get it and have no trouble with it. I knew this going in when she moved in four years ago, so this isn't a surprise or a deal-breaker. On my bad days, however, when I've come home to find that she's left more garbage in the sink for me to clean up instead of throwing it in the garbage can that is *literally right there* and then she makes some sort of snide comment about something I've done that she doesn't like, it takes all my self-control not to snap at her. 

Anyway, I think my first order of business will be to go to bed as early as possible tonight in an attempt to be better rested for the next couple of days. I'm working in-office and KK is working from home, which will spare us some of the logistical issues at least. I would also like to finish all of the packing by Sunday. I think it's all pretty doable, but I definitely need to be less of a zombie for all the dominoes to fall just right.

I think I'll leave it there for now. Work is so busy I may not have time to post before my shift is over otherwise. Catch you on the flip side, friends!
oursin: Photograph of small impressionistic metal figurine seated reading a book (Reader)
[personal profile] oursin

What I read

Gail Godwin, Getting to Know Death: A Meditation (2024) - rather slight, one for the completist, which I suppose I am.

Robert Rodi, Bitch Goddess (2014): 'told entirely through interviews, e-mails, fan magazine puff pieces, film reviews, shooting scripts, greeting cards, extortion notes, and court depositions', the story of the star of a lot of dire B-movies who has a later-life move into soap-stardom. I hadn't read this one before and it was a lot of campy fun.

TC Parker, Tradwife (2024) - another of those mystery/thrillers which riffs off true-crime style investigation - somebody here I think mentioned it? - I thought it went a few narrative twists too far though was pretty readable up till then.

On the go

Apart from those, still ticking on with Upton Sinclair, Wide Is The Gate (Lanny Budd, #4), boy I am glad that I am reading these in e-form, because they must be monstrous great bricks otherwise. In this one he actually ventures back to Germany, his marriage starts to crumble, he continues his delicate dance between all the various opposed interests in his life while managing to get support to the anti-Nazi/Fascist cause, Spain is now in the picture, and I have just seen a passing mention to Earl Russell being sent down for his Reno divorce (that wasn't quite the story, but one can quite imagine that was what gossip might have made of it 30 years down the line).

Up next

New Literary Review.

The three books for the essay review.

I think more Robert Rodi might be a nice change of pace from Lanny's ordeals.

A day of nothing

Jun. 10th, 2025 09:45 pm
mousme: A picture of the muppet Forgetful Jones from Sesame Street (Forgetful Jones)
[personal profile] mousme
I don't understand how I can have spent all of today doing next to nothing during my work from home day and yet be absolutely fucking exhausted anyway. (This is a back-dated post, because I collapsed in an exhausted heap into my bed instead of updating) I spent most of the day cleaning out my long-neglected inbox. For the record, my job involves sorting through emails in a separate, shared inbox all day long, so I don't pay attention to my personal inbox most of the time except to quickly read through the new emails in case something important has cropped up. In the past I was more diligent about sorting through my emails and filing them away into various folders, but somewhere around last November I stopped doing that and just let them kind of pile up. I kept meaning to get around to cleaning everything up in there, but I never did, so yesterday I bit the bullet and spent several hours doing that.

There were just shy of 800 emails to sort through, so it took a while, and I am glad that I had a day without having to write SitReps or work on other projects so that I could concentrate on that. I got it down to just 3 emails and today it's down to two because I was able to "action" one of the items (I do hate that it has become a verb, even though in principle I agree that language is fluid and that we should not be prescriptivist about it). One of the emails is something I only want to do sometime next month at the earliest. I am being sent on a course to learn about railway operations, which is super cool, but because part of it will be on-site I am required to wear safety gear (specifically work gloves and steel-toed boots), which I have to purchase myself and then submit my receipts for reimbursement. These days I am hemorrhaging money thanks to the new house and the moving shenanigans, so having to spend another $200 on gear (even if I get reimbursed eventually) is not a prospect I particularly relish. Ugh.

I am probably paying for several late nights over the past few days. I haven't even been going to bed late for a "good" reason, I've just been messing around and putting off going to bed. That has resulted in my dragging myself a little through my days, and the minute I actually get into bed I can't keep my eyes open at all and am always at risk of dropping off to sleep over whatever I'm reading and not getting my CPAP mask on. I shudder to think what sort of condition I'd be in without the CPAP, given that I now know it's making a difference in the quality of my sleep, even if it hasn't resulted in noticeable improvements in energy levels. 

All right, that's it for now. Catch you on the flip side, friends!